onthewingsofwar

trainhardbestrong:

hannahroad:

hannahroad:

hannahroad:

Miley: “Dad I have something for Tanners bug collection”

my uncle: “that’s great”

Miley: “it’s a bird”

my uncle: “no its not”

-chirping noise-

image

They let it go and it flew away just fine, so we’re wondering how she caught it.

update:

she caught another bird.

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update: she caught a squirrel today

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She is gonna rule the world one day with this power

free-will-for-the-fallen
constantbullshitting:

oilauren:

"I looked at my hand and my little finger was gone – the bone was sticking out. It’s the weirdest feeling; one second you’re fine and your little finger is there, and the next second it’s gone. It shoves reality up your backside. I was in so much pain and shock that the first thing that hit my head was the beat and the bass. The bass was hard, so I just ripped off my top, wrapped it around my finger and tied it up as tight as I could and skanked it out for half an hour. My mentality was, ‘I’ve only been here for an hour, I’ve paid £10 for this night, I’ve lost my little finger – am I seriously going to go? Nah, I’m going to skank until I can’t skank any more.’ After that, my mate dragged me down to the paramedics."
Friends later told him that a “bunch of stoners found [his] little finger and were playing catch with it.”

now THAT’S what i call a party

constantbullshitting:

oilauren:

"I looked at my hand and my little finger was gone – the bone was sticking out. It’s the weirdest feeling; one second you’re fine and your little finger is there, and the next second it’s gone. It shoves reality up your backside. I was in so much pain and shock that the first thing that hit my head was the beat and the bass. The bass was hard, so I just ripped off my top, wrapped it around my finger and tied it up as tight as I could and skanked it out for half an hour. My mentality was, ‘I’ve only been here for an hour, I’ve paid £10 for this night, I’ve lost my little finger – am I seriously going to go? Nah, I’m going to skank until I can’t skank any more.’ After that, my mate dragged me down to the paramedics."

Friends later told him that a “bunch of stoners found [his] little finger and were playing catch with it.”

now THAT’S what i call a party

breathingunderwater24
gunpowderandspark:

dapperhatsandfancypants:

theausterevolunteer:

oscarstardis:

stillmonkeys:

From A Series of Unfortunate Events DVD commentary track.

if you haven’t watched this film with the commentary then you are missing out, it’s hilarious. “Lemony Snicket” was completely unhappy with the film and wanted no real part of it and so in the commentary he just fucks about. Seriously, at one point he gets out an accordion and drowns out the director with his playing

"nearly all of my life"

Lemony Snicket sass is what I aspire to in life.

"Lemony Snicket" (Dan Handler) was asked if he liked the movie.
He said “I love the movie as much as someone who wrote 8 drafts of a movie before being fired from his own creation could possibly be.”
The man’s life is sarcasm and it’s beautiful.

gunpowderandspark:

dapperhatsandfancypants:

theausterevolunteer:

oscarstardis:

stillmonkeys:

From A Series of Unfortunate Events DVD commentary track.

if you haven’t watched this film with the commentary then you are missing out, it’s hilarious. “Lemony Snicket” was completely unhappy with the film and wanted no real part of it and so in the commentary he just fucks about. Seriously, at one point he gets out an accordion and drowns out the director with his playing

"nearly all of my life"

Lemony Snicket sass is what I aspire to in life.

"Lemony Snicket" (Dan Handler) was asked if he liked the movie.

He said “I love the movie as much as someone who wrote 8 drafts of a movie before being fired from his own creation could possibly be.”

The man’s life is sarcasm and it’s beautiful.

free-will-for-the-fallen

So I was explaining my gender-fluidity to my grandmother

  • Me: So sometimes I'm a boy, but sometimes I'm a girl.
  • Grandma: I have enough idiot granddaughters already
  • Me:
  • Grandma:
  • Me:
  • Grandma: But I also have enough idiot grandsons, so having an idiot who isn't really either one is kind of refreshing.
  • *then later*
  • My mom: Alex, can you come pick up these LEGOs?
  • Me: Yeah... *doesn't move at all*
  • Grandma: Katie, go pick up the LEGOs
  • Me: Yeah, alright *goes to pick up LEGOs*
  • Grandma: See, you addressed the boy, but I addressed the girl. Boys are lazy, girls get crap done.